I think im cool...

Everybody talks, and everybody listens, but somehow the truth always comes up missing. The anthem of my life. I sometimes think that my life will be much much easier if people didnt talk about what they didnt know. But its cool, everythings cool now. Everyone thinks we are talking, who cares now, its not like i can go around to everyone and set the record straight, so ill let them think. And its crazy, once she got caught up in her own thoughts one day and said "I feel like im replacing her"... I had to stop her dead in her tracks and let her know that she would never do such a thing, often times i think that no one will....

Today she said,"I dont think your girlfriend likes me too much".. Yeah, she still calls you my girlfriend. She said "I think she thinks that we're talking or something, and her friends are always mean mugging me". And after telling her again for the 100th time that we arent together anymore, All i could say was "O really", and keep going. Ironically, as soon as she finished her statement, we walked around the corner and saw you standing there with all the girls that have probably been giving her the dirty looks. Lol, Realizing that I had no choice but too keep walking, i just kept going hoping you wouldnt turn around. But you did.. lol. Then Destini comes over yelling at me about how "she knows that im not trying to talk to the girl, but it really isnt helping that we keep being seen walking together." Sorry Destini. lol.

I did alot of thinking and dreaming today. I kept thinking about what bothered me about the situation. Tried not to look at you much, too bad im going to be in a class with you for an hour and 15 minutes tomorrow, more starting out he corner of my eye it will be, lol. I admitted it. I found a new locker to put my coat in, so you dont have to worry about that anymore. Thanks to the new addition to the crew Matt. I also thought about your choices of people to spill your heart out to. You chose the girl out of al the guys, he guy that we would rather not have him be a guy, but no one really wants to tell him, so I just act like i tolerate him. I mean, i know that you had to talk to someone about what was going on, but why him? Why not, Brandon! or Menelik! or Destini!! Cool people, and they dont tell all your business. Im still trying to get Destini to spill about what you all talk about. (yeah, i still ask her about you). I thought about prom? Oddly, are we still going together, i doubt it. just a thought though. lol. I thought about my book, I wonder if youre still reading? I wondered if you'd reply if I text'd you. Doubt it, decided not to waste my time. I thought about what id write on this site knowing that youd read it all evetually. Alot of what ifs, alot of maybes, alot of wondering. I almost started to straighten up my room knowing that it was tuesday and that special day wednesday was approaching, but then i remembered that you wont be coming over anymore. I thought about what was next. So i think im cool, as long as i dont look. As long as I keep acting like I dont care.