I'll Find a Way....

Rachel Yamagata-Ill Find a way

This song was.. amazing the first time i heard it.

25 songs of christmas-Day 25

This is the end of the 25 songs of Christmas series. Its been fun. Hope you enjoyed. I did. Merry Christmas from my family to yours!

25 songs of Christmas-Day 24

25 songs of Christmas-Day 23

Journey to success Pt. 2

This is certainly a post that can give no definitive direction. I think i really wrote it to raise more questions than it answers. But I must admit a certain leaning of opinion on the matter.

As much as I like the concept of sitting at the lake with someone, gazing off into the sunset, I could never be this way. I love to enjoy those moments, but I find that they are only sweet when contrasted against the spice of the pursuit. When youre still chasing. When there is a chance that you will lose it all.

I believe the problem with many failed pursuits and shattered dreams is more about the tactics than the destination. You can have two individuals with the same starting point and finish line and yet watch one live a life of joy and excitement, while the other wallows in their constant frustration. I’m not saying the one succeeded and the other did not, but that one properly pursued their passion while the other poisoned their life with it. This is the difference between success no matter what and failure is not an option. The first perspective knows that their success comes from their willingness to try, while the latter is enslaved by the fear of the end result. Both are in pursuit, but only one can truly be happy at the same time.

The Paradox of our journey to success..

I havent written a thought driven post in some time, so with some free time on my hands and alot of things running through my mind.. Why not today..

One thing that drives us to passionately pursue our desired goals is the vision of those who have succeeded before us. We see individuals who have deciphered the secret to success. They usually walk around in the lime ight and chanting about how terrible success is but if given the opportunity, they always say that they would never change a thing. They’re asked to tell their tale; the road that led them to the promised land and we’re almost always met with some rehearsed response about following your dreams and never giving up, “Because I didn’t, and look where I am now!” they would say.
But this paradox that I am talking about concerns the possibility of a life wasted, chasing after a dream. Out of those few at the top of the mountain, how many others have died on the way up, never even tasting the slightest bit of sweet success? And yet if we don’t seek our goals and dreams, we are most likely going to sit at the bottom of the mountain anyway.

Some would suggest that it is better to enjoy the basics of life and stop pining for more. I love this idea, but have never been able to feel settled with it. I’m a driven person, but I think it’s just human nature to dream big and journey ahead. This is much of what keeps us going as a species. Without that constant carrot dangling in our midst, we would surely have less passion to spice up our lives, and have a little more fun. It’s all a great paradox!

25 songs of Christmas-Day 22

25 days of christmas-Day 21

25 songs of Christmas-Day 20

25 Songs of Christmas-Day 19

HAHA, why not take it back to the beach boys?
Beach Boys-Little St. Nick

25 songs of Christmas-Day 18

25 songs of Christmas- Day 17

What better song to post 8 days before christmas than.. the "8 days of Christmas"!

No.. I have not changed, Ive grown up..

I was with an old friend today and she said "O my god, Youve changed so much".. I then went on to explain to her that I have not changed at all, im still the same guy i was the last time you saw me. When i think of someone that has changed, then I think of someone who was acting to begin with, which makes them phony.. Im not phony. Ive grown up... i dont hold grudges, there are no hard feelings but im not dumb either .... A friend and I were talking last week after a good game of basketball. And he said something that made soo much sense to me in reference to a guy from my high school. He said "Im past the fact that he stole my money, Im past all the other snake stuff he has done to me and to the people around me. But i know that im bound to make ALOT of money in my lifetime, and because of that, I have to eliminate the snakes out of my life now, before its too late. If i let him hang around me too much, he may infect my circle of real friends, and then Im just all fucked up!"... I laughed while he was talking but when he was done, I sat back, and i was really thinking... He's right. So i mean, ill never treat someone wrong or anything like that but If i just become a little stand offish towards you, its not because im upset with you about something youve done, or anything like that.. Most likely the reason for this is that,You are probably one of the snakes in my life, and i need to do an inventory of my friends. And... you just unfortunately didnt make the cut.

I think that everyone needs to sit back and do a real inventory of your friends.. dont let one bad apple spoil the rest.

25 songs of Christmas-Day 16

25 Songs of Christmas-Day 15

25 songs of Christmas- Day 14

The Whispers- The Christmas Song

25 songs of christmas-Day 13

Boyz II Men- The Birth of Christ

Happy Birthday Bridgette!

My mother and sister has seen you quite a few times over the past several months. I have not had the pleasure. And honestly, that doesnt bother me at all. That ship has sailed.. Despite all of this, i have not forgotten about you, or your birthday obviously.. And i was going to send you a gift or something but a few things stopped me from doing so.. I dont know if you still live on 79th and I couldnt decide on what to get you.. Soo.. this post will have to do... Happy Birthday!

25 songs of Christmas-Day 12

Danger Danger- Naughty Naughty Christmas

25 Songs of Christmas-Day 11

Britney Spears-Only Wish this year

25 songs of Christmas-Day 10

Stevie Wonder-What Christmas means to me

25 songs of Christmas-Day 9

Hark the Herald-Mariah Carey

25 songz of Christmas- Day 8

25 songs of Christmas-Day 7

Mary Did you Know- Clay Aiken

25 songs of Christmas- Day 6

Gerald Levert- Christmas without my girl

25 songs of Christmas-Day 5

Neyo-Home

25 songs of christmas- Day 4

O come all ye faithful- Luther Vandross

25 Songs of christmas- Day 3

Someday at Christmas-Jackson 5

25 songs of Christmas- Day 2

Jackson 5- I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus

Kids These Days-My Days

Kids These Days - "My Days" Music Video from T.E.H.O. on Vimeo.

Ive always enjoyed Kids these days, I first heard them at a fundraiser that i was invited to. I really liked the fact that they brought so many genres together to creat what they now call "Traphouse Rock". Its all extremely dope. Check it out! Search them on YouTube for more.

25 Songs of Christmas- Day 1

I thought this song was perfect to start off with because i woke up to snow this morning.... booo

All you need is a little asian in you!

So now you may understand why i want an asian to have my children... Above is Chanel Iman, gorgeous to say the least. She is black and Korean. I always said that a i want my wife to be white and asian, so when we have children they'll be "perfect" so to speak. I mean, whatever kids I have will be great because they'll come from my sperm, lucky, kids they will be. But if I have a baby with a woman that is white and asian.. they get everything. They get my genes, so they'll be a Borom. They'll be white,so they can take advantage of the whole "white privilege" thing..Then they'll be asain so they should be smart and innocent(a fathers dream).. put all of this together... And you get perfection.. Boy i cant wait

25 songs of Christmas

Starting December 1st through the 25th, im going to be posting my favorite Christmas songs each day! Seeing how Christmas season is my favorite time of the year, i had to do something different!

Quote of the Day-Brown Sugar

"We're all looking for the wifey type. A woman that's fine, smart, classy... but not a snob; hella hella sexy..... but not a hoe. That's brown sugar..."

"I love her already"

So i met this girl like 2 weeks ago.... Ive know of her for years, but we just formally met a couple weeks ago. She's petite, light skinned, long hair... and a glowing personality... The things i catch her doing...when she thinks no one is looking, you cant help but smile.... She's so classy, but its not an overwhelming amount of class, that she's boring... I remember last night when i was going to pick her up, my friend was in the passenger seat, and as the girl was walking to the car, my friend said "Doesnt she look like she just got pealed right off of a magazine cover?"... I said "yep, I love her already", lol. She took the words right out of my mouth, and her beauty isnt even artificial.. (besides the hair, but who doesnt wear weave nowadays)When i saw her, she wasnt even wearing makeup and she was gorgeous. "right off a magazine cover"...
She's smart, but still clueless about alot of things. But not so clueless that im sitting there wondering if she has a brain. Its like a funny clueless. lol.

Based on my post about a year ago, you all know im not really into smokers...unless she smokes cigars, or just looks really sexy smoking(like scar...RARE)... And not only does she smoke, she smokes blacks! the worst... but i walked with her to the store, to buy some, and as we were walking back I lit it for her because i made her realize that if she burned it slowly, with a torch lighter, she'd enjoy it more. Even a black.... As I was lighting it... she caught my eye.. like the picture above above.. and i was just.. stuck. (this picture was taken by me in my sisters summer camp)

It was only just a dream....

Im looking forward to Nelly's comeback,

The last time i saw you, you ain't have no clothes on!

Home for the holidays- J. Cole

Roc Nation

Quote of the day

"You're not a hoe, you just made a hoe decision"

-J. Cole

"Jay Z and Beyonce are the cutest couple!"......FALSE!!

A friend of mine tried to argue with me about Jay z and Beyonce's relationship.... but I still think that Chilli and Usher were the best couple... Everything was so real for them.. and it all looked so genuine... even the break up....I mean, they just look like they belong together...Like two puzzle pieces.... You can see it in every picture their in together.. its all just... there...

Blame Game

Relationships have come up in a few of my recent conversations and a question that often comes up is "When was your last relationship?" I always say january.. then that follows with...How long were you all together?... Over a year in a relationship... years talking to eachother.. "what happened?!"...I then said... "God decided to stop punishing me", lol ... But after i get my laugh, i clean it up.. and explain that it was over a year of being on a boat.. and just going with the tide... and the fact of the matter is.. only one person was rowing... if only one side of the boat is rowing... wahat happens to the boat?.. it goes in circles.. so bascially.. our relation was just a big cycle... happiness.sex,rumors,tears,argue,.... then happiness... Im surprised how we survived for as long as we did..

Then she popped the question.....Do you all still talk?
Then i proceded to tell her about our relationship post break up and how a couple months ago.. i told her some of whaat i was really thinking throughout the relationship, and we havent talked since...(except she did send her condolences when my pastor died, it was appreciated... but thats it,)

Then she asked.. "well do you still think about her"

Honestly... only when provoked by conversations like these... or when i she pops up on my twitter time line.. or on my Facebook news feed.. besides that.. she's a thing of the past.. My friends know how i feel about her, so they dont bring her up, no reason to...

Ive grown up since we've split... Ive grown up since we've had our last words...I mean, the pass system was for the hoes..and ive moved on from it all..No hard feelings, if i ever see her again, which unfortunately, i know its going to happen, ill be cordial.. its whatever you know...I could sit here and play the blame game.. but im old enough to own up to my actions... Everything was as much her fault as it was mine... One of her friends told me one cay "What she did to you, tops everything you ever did to her, and if not, you all are even"... I concur... Lets call it even..

Letter to my unborn children... Understand...

Here is something you guys must understand...

You guys were born into a very privelaged family.But you are still not above anyone. Your socio-economic status does not give you the right to treat anyone else as if they are inferior to you. You are wealthy.. at all... Your parents are... You are poor. You will have everything you need and you will be rewarded with the things you want, if you do as i say.... Live, Love, Have fun

From,
Your Father

Letter to my unborn son.... Respect

Rule #20

Dear Son,

Recently, i was talking to your uncle Kevin. (Kevin is on of my friends, and there is a 99% chance that you'll meet him so im not going to tell you too much about him now... im going to let you find out for yourself) But anywho... he was writing a letter to someone, and he asked for my assistance. He wanted to say something. without actually saying it. I told him that the way he was doing it made him sound like a dick. Nobody likes dicks... His response was.. "But youre a dick, and people respect you"... Yeah im a dick, but im a different kind a dick. And the things i do are respectable. Thats why people respect me.... Moral of this story is.. Respect is not given, its earned... Living off of your name, will only get you so far. Eventually, you must make a name for yourself.

From,
Your Father

Letter to my unborn son.. Mom's home cooking

Rule #19
Dear son,

Compliment your mother's cooking.. even if you dont like it.

From,
Your Father

Letter to my unborn son.. Her Boyfriends

Rule #18
Get to know your sisters boyfriends.. Ill rely on your opinion..

From,
Your Father

Letter to my unborn son.. Her famiyl

Rule #17
Dear son,

Some people forget about this little fact. You marry the girl, You marry her family. dont be the the lucky guy that gets stuck with the lousy in-laws..

From,
Your father

Letter to my unborn daughter.. Your Beautiful Hair

Rule #1
Try a hairstyle, that you'll later regret..Ill get over it.

From.
Your father

Letters to my unborn son.. Stand the rain..

Rule #16

Dear son,

Sometimes, the best thing to do in the rain, is to be quiet and listen. Think about it.

From,
Your Father

Letter to my unborn son...About your sisters

Rule #15...

Be nice to your sisters.You are their cheerleader,confidant, and most importantly, their bodyguard.

From,
Your Father

Letter to my unborn children.

Dear kids,

If you ever get arrested....call me.... you all get one free pass...

See you later....

I was actually taking your passing pretty hard...And I was really having a hard time accepting the fact that you were gone... So ive decided not to.. It'll be like.. We went a while without seeing eachother...So until then.. Rest in peace... And i can really understand why God would have wanted you up there, close to him, because you were truly an angel on earth...


See you later Bishop...Thank You.... I love you... Until we meet again...

How to talk to black people?

How to Talk to Black People - Watch more Funny Videos

What are you waiting for!!

"What is the Mr Borom afraid of?":

Earlier today i decided to meet up with one of m friends that i hadnt seen in a couple weeks.. She claims that i dont love her anymore... and i was trying to explain to her that phones work both ways.. and i havent changed my number...But in the midst of our joking around , and being blown around campus by the 60mph wind(literally)...She was screaming because she's like a hundred pounds(literally) and she really couldnt walk through the wind, luckily i had that extra 40 pounds to assist me... But while she is still attempting to walk, she screams "David! This wind is going to blow me in the street and make me get hit by a car! Im scared!" I called her a big baby.. But when the wind slowed down and she was finally walking normally..She looks at me and says.. "im not a baby! I was really scared, youre so mean! You were probably scared to!
Me: Not at all
Her: So what are you afraid of? What is Mr. Borom afraid of?
Me: Whats up with that random question.. Where'd that come from?
Her: Ive always wanted to ask you that. You always act like nothing really bothers you. Which makes it hard to tell what youre thinking sometimes.. I just want to know.. What scares you?
Me: Nothing...
Her: Come on David i'm serius.. tell me.. Your pastor just died right.. Are you afraid of death?
Me: (I pause and look at her, then say.... "alright seriously...Im not really scared of death.... Im moreso scared of dying before i get to accomplish everything i want to accomplish in my lifetime.. I fear...Fear? I fear that ill be too scared to accomplish everything.. and it'll hold me back.
Her: Thats cool.. But i knew you werent going to have a normal fear like everyone else.. Why cant ou be afraid of the dark, or of heights.. you had to get all deep
Me: That was deep? lol...

She knows.. and now everyone else knows... thats my fear.. My one and only.. or i guess you cant consider it two..

Smile....

I love to make people smile.. Its.. fun.. and not only will it brighten up their day... often times it'll brighten up yours too..

Make someone smile

You'll see!

I like this song... But ive noticed something recently...

For this dude to be so darn smart.... His grammar sucks...

"I fought a good fght!!"

This is the Bishop that will remain in my memory.. the kind compassionate man, that was full of life.... I can remember him standing up in front of that pulpit yelling at the top of his lungs! lol,, Dancing... singing...

In the video,at 2 minutes Bishop says.. "i fought a good fight... im done.. the race is over...".... My eyes got heavy when he said this, my throat began to hurt... but as i put my hand over my face.. I kept listening... and later he says... "I want you to HOLD ON! When you feel like you cant take it any longer,when you feel like you cant shed any more tears, i just want you to HOLD ON"..... And thats what im going to do.. Im going to hold on..

Thank you....

These are times that i will remember with this great man....

Ill be missing you.....

He's really gone...

The last time someone close to me died was almost 10 years ago... When my grandfather died... And now. this great man has passed too... Its going to be weird walking through the church halls, and not seeing him strut down the same hall... Its going to be odd not seeing that gold mercedes speed down lake park.. He drove so fast to be so old, lol... I mentioned it to him once and he said "If i wanted to go slow... i'd walk"... He did it all.. to the end.. he even planned his own funerals.... He knew it was time...And he was ready...Everytime I think about him, chills run through my body....Hmm... The last time i went to a funeral of someone who was really close to me, was my kindergarten teacher's... But Bishop's funeral is thursday and Friday... I wonder how im going to take it... I planed on going to both.. but after thursday.. i dont think ill be able to face it again...I dont think i want to....

He's number 1 in my book....

Yep.. Kanye West is my favorite artist...Drake is my number 2... number 3? i haven't quite decided who i want to put in that spot.. its between Jay Z and J Cole.... But after i saw runaway..i realized that Kanye deserves to be higher on my list.. Drake as yet to really disappoint me on a song.. but i have ot give Kanye credit for his years of great music.. I still play the college dropout.. you cant forget that Kanye.. And im loving what Kankye is becoming... Im pretty sure that his PR people have taught him to shut up.. but in many ways.. its the old Kanye+the older Kanye= A better Kanye... Someone that i don't mind labeling as "a genius on too many different levels".... I cant wait to see what this guy has coming in the coming years...

What was I thinking?!

So recently i asked myself.... Why arent you writing anything to your daughter? Im always talking about my daughters(unborn)... I plan on having two... and i talk alot about girls on this site... so why arent I giving some tips to my beautiful daughters.. so that they hopefully dont grow up to be like my sister.. or my friends.. or other people that have run through my life... I also know that... If my daughter ever brings home a guy that is anything like i use to be.. there will be 3 shootings... That dirty little boy first... she's next... then im going to shoot myself,lol..I wont have it...


So yeah.. expect somethings...And a new pic for the upcoming father/son pieces... More suitable...

You're beautiful.... just the way you are....

So... im confused... why is it that the ugly girls have high self esteem and think theyre the best looking things alive.. and the attractive girls are so self conscious? My friend is... "drop dead gorgeous".. The first time i met her i thought she was like 25-26... nope.. 18... My first thought after i found out how old she was was... "i need her on the roster"... then later on i found out that she was a muslim... So i decided to settle for having a really gorgeous friend... And she's really smart too, its like a walking national geographic: the Egyptian edition. But back to the point... Everytime i see her,, she always ask "hows my hair? How do i look? Do you like this?" Blah blah blah... And im always like.... "What?! Yes, you look great.. all the time..." The first time i met her.. she was wearing a hoody and jeans... And she still deserved a double take.. I had to pull out my phone so i would stop staring at her... Im pretty sure that she could not take a shower for a day or two.. roll out the bed.. and just come to school.. and she would still deserve a second look...I dont know how many times we've gone back and forth starting with:

Me:dude, you look fine, stop fixing your hair..
Her: You're just saying that, its sticking up
Me: I dont think you're giving it a chance to stick up
Her: Hush! Im fixing it
Me: lol, alrighty

Hmmm... curse the guy that almost took her virginity... lucky lucky lucky...

Home....

Today, a great man was called home... He was easily, one of the top 5 most influential people in my life. He was a father. A son, a leader, an entrepreneur, i think he touched the life of everyone he came in contact with. The last time i saw him, which was maybe a month ago.. He saw me in the hall, and said "David, the first time i met you, your clothes were falling all off of you,I couldn't believe you were wearing a belt, now your clothes fit properly, you look good", lol... He watched me grow up.... 89 years on this earth.... then it was time... I dont even think i have it in me to get deep in this post... Just... a few words...

A familiar voice....

So i know i said that i would stop talking about her(wait.. no i didnt) but she keeps popping up in my life.. Weird stuff...

SO im in my kitchen making me some chicken tenders and tater tots.. then i hear some singing coming out of my room...But we dont have any girls over today... I stop and listen for a minute and it sounds so familiar..So i go see what it is... I walk down the hall.. look at my computer and just freeze at the door... My friend is looking at a video that i took of bridgette singing to me.. well more so humming, because she couldnt sing...I hadnt seen this video in months....Like.. im staring at this video, and I can hear my friend asking me questions.. but i wasnt listening.. all my attention was on this video.... then the singing is over.. and she's talking.... then she grabs the phone and pulls me on the bed.. then *click*... camera goes off.. and im out of this trance...

Then my friend was like "Yo bro what is this?"... I replied "its nothing, why are you on my computer, lol" then i go back to the kitchen... and forget about it... until now, whileim reflecting on my day..

Ill buy it!!

AS... perfect as music should be...

Ive loved this song since the moment i heard a snippet of it on the Best Man.. And recently i had a friend over, and she played it by accident, i made her turn it back on.. and we listened to the whole 7 minutes! One of the best songs by Stevie.

Sometimes, this is exactly whats going through my head...

Me.... A lawyer?.....No Thanks

Growing up.. before i discovered my passion for finance.. i wanted to be a lawyer... I liked the adrenaline rush.. but back then, i dont think i rally had it in me to stand in front of a courtroom and do... anything... When i got to high school.. i was told a couple times that i should look into it... First, by Ms. Hey, who was the academic center coordinator... She said that i should pursue business or law.. by that time, i already knew that business was for me... Then sophomore year, my History teacher told me that i would make a good lawyer after i convinced him to change my grade due to some story I made up... He never changes anyones grade.. but i got him to change mine... I thought i had heard the last of it until i got to college...After reading my second English paper, my professor sent me an email today and asked if i was sure I wanted to go into finance... I replied, "yes im positive".. He said that my writing was exceptional, even though he knows that i "bullshitted" half of it. He said that even though my content was complete bull, I had the ability to make the reader feel however I want them to feel, just by the way I word my sentences. He said that he could imagine me in a courtroom talking to a talking to a jury... and having a very successful career as a lawyer. He told me to watch "a time to kill".. he said "Matthew McConaughey, thats you David, think about it.. And if you dont get your J.D, Write a book, make sure I get a copy"....

Ive seen the movie already. McConaughey was good... And sorry Prof. Bennett, i did consider being a lawyer.. years ago.. Maybe ill still go get a law degree... when im bored and rich, lol.. Until then... No thanks...And for the book... im going to start back writing it.. Ive been wanting to...Just.. Missing something...And O hey.. thanks for that A.And i must thank Ms. Banks, for scaring me into becoming a better writer...And Drake...A part of my writing ritual is putting on Drake.. Let the music fill my room.. and flow through my ears... then.... Amazing things run through my brain.. and into my fingers... I swear... when the music isnt playing... My writing is boring... its dull.. I cant do it.. Its like... My brain is blank...

These guys are alike in quite a few ways...

Recently i mentioned that I said that Michael Jackson reminded me of Michael Jackson. With the help of my new research tool called Elgoog... also known as Google... I found a few articles on West saying that he is "ready to take Michael Jackson's throne" and that "Michael Jackson gave him(Kanye) his powers"...

Now, i dont know about the King of Pop giving Kanye his powers, or Kanye trying to replace Michael Jackson, but there are son things that are similar with the two men. S0me things Kanye has done that looks alot like osmething Michael has done, or would do.... Like...

1.His speaking voice is alot softer...Like Michael Jackson
It seems like these two men's voices move in the opposite direction as other males....Unlike MJ... Even though Kanye talks like a 12 year old, he still seems to rap like a grown man.

2.He does random outrageous things... Like Michael Jackson...
I dont even have to mention how many times Michael Jackson has been seen in public doing something outrageous.. and Kanye is no different.. Most recent;y, hopping on the VMA stage to express his disapproval with Taylor Swifts award.. He explains this outburst earlier this morning on a TV show. "it was a cross between Sincerity and Alcohol"
3.He's a musical genius ..Like Michael Jackson...
Everyone will probably agree that Michael Jackson was a musical genius. Many including my buddy Scarlett, will swear up and down, that Kanye is an idiot.. and cant rap... But since this is my blog.. They dont matter, lol. Kanye is also a musical Genius... ZA very talented rapper and Producer.. His acting may need some work, but the creative insight that he adds to all of his projects is impeccable.

Michael Jackson spent millions on alot of dumb things... And Kanye spends millions permanently replacing his teeth with diamonds....
Well Michael reasons for spending large sums of cash on random things, him just having fun...Kanye said that he "thought the diamonds looked cooler"... What? O and now i want someone to lie and say that kanye doesnt look like a little kid in this picture... below..

I said oops did I let that slip... Deceiving...

Our future is bright!!

So when I'm with the guys.. and we're just sitting around, chillin.. Often times we talk about how we're going to be when we get older... So far.. we have a billionaire businessman, a cluck, an average joe, and the funny man that has money but you dont really know what he does... lol, im not going to say who each person is.. but if you know us.. you can pretty much figure it out..

Fireworks..My version

So while listening to frieworks.. i decide to go line by line.. and comment on each one! this.. should be entertaining.

Money really has changed everything... What if i didnt have the ability to go home, and feel obligated to give my mother some money.. What if the time when i tell myself im poor... its true... What if that time when it was like .29 cent in my account...that was really all i had. What if i didnt have the option to just simply transfer some funds..

Hate is so familiar to me, im slowly embracing it. I mean, im an asshole, i know, im workign on it. but alot of people love me because of it. But alot of people dont, for the same reason, but I honestly dont care either way...It doesnt come natural, but im making due.

My dreams who Im racing with,You can see Im pacin it so that Im always chasing it. You know.. i realized a while ago that i could probably open a million dollar margin account at anytime now that im 18, and i would technically be a millionaire.. but i don want to take the easy way out.. I want to do it from scratch, with my money.. I want to go through the ups and downs....

Every night.... all i see is fireworks... My dreams are filled with them.. honestly.. its kind of weird.. Ive truely had th esame dream over and over, and i finally understand...I think.. lol

Verse 2 of this song is the one that hits me...

"I’m just such a gentleman
you should give it up for me
look at how I’m placing al my napkins and my cutlery
I can tell it wasn’t love I just thought you f-ck with me
who coulda predicted lucky strikes would have you stuck with me
yeh, you kept my wits about me luckily
what happened between us that night it always seems to trouble me
now all of a sudden these gossip writers wanna cover me
and you making it seem that it happened that way because of me
but I was curious and I’ll never forget it baby
what an experience
you coulda been the one but it wasnt that serious
their was smoke in the air before now its me clearing it
that felt good, all and all I learned a lesson from it though
you never see it coming you just get to see it go
yeah I shoulda looked up in the sky at first
now I see it in her eyes
Fireworks!"

Like.. this is it.. or it was... I didnt know she was really falling for me, i mean, i knew she liked me but that was it.. Who would have known that a simple hey would have turned into what it did. To this day i dont know if she was just messing with me.. Sometimes i say yeah, but then its times when i think about the pain and hurt that filled each tear that fell when she heard about the Sara incident. You cant fake that... Or the times sitting in my car, where she'd sit and tell me all her dreams and fantasies...and how she pictured herself living in a fairy tale. It was all so real to her..

What happened between us, always seems to trouble me.And all of a sudden we were the talk of the town. And of course, Destini said it was my fault about what Jade was goign through, but, i tried to level that tide, and leave Bridgette alone, but it was something always pulling me back.. I think in addition to me actually liking her, i was curious.. I was curious about what will happen next, whats going to be the next car convo. Whats in her head now. How many times do our lips have to touch until the fireworks stop.. How many times can i look deep into your eyes... and see... Fireworks? Or was it just...... I always wonder.... And ill never forget it. Now when i write an auto biography... You can get a couple pages. We were never "official", but you still made the same impact on me that Jade once did.... Its crazy.. I dont think i will be satisfied until i sit yo down one more time... and let us talk... face to face... just you and me...You know... Probably wont be able to pull that off for a while...And at the same time i can only imagine how this conversation can go bad.. im sure you still have that attitude.. and if my pot starts to boil, im going to sink back in to the other David..and the conversation will be very counter productive.. I definitely have to get full control over my sarcasm before i have serious conversations..Like.. i can control it.. but only to a certain extent...And that wont work....Once someone presses the wrong button, i can only fake sincerity for a moment..then its just straight sarcasm.....

I knew this day would come...

so im downtown pretty often nowadays.. Mostly because I live so close, and the bus is free. And brett works at the water tower. So... Im at the Water tower saturday night. Brett told me to come up there to meet this girl, that he thinks Id enjoy. Im on my way up the escalators... Around and around.. Escalator to escalator.. then i get to maybe the 4th floor.. And somebody starts calling my name.. A familiar voice, but i didnt know who it was, then i turn around, and across the mall, i see a girl, smiling and waving, i wave back, still not knowing who it was... so i get another floor up, adn I look back down at the girl... And.. My eyes got big! lol. I get up to Hollister, and see Brett... And im like.. "Brett.. I think i just saw Bridgette?"..He said.. Yeah you probably did, she works at Abercrombie with Sara, I forgot to tell you that." I was just like.. "O, thats odd".. and that was the end of that convo.

But on my way home, after Hollister closed, Brett had to stay another couple hours, and I wasnt trying to wait, so i hopped my lazy self in a cab and went home.. then maybe half way home, i get a call...Sara Yu.. ( o what does she want).. I answer, and she acts like she didnt know that I went to school in chicago.. so while she's asking a series of dumb questions I hear Bridgette in the background "Ask him where he is.. Ask him what he's doing tonight.. Tell him to meet you somewhere"... So while sara is asking me these questions, im not really trying to see either one of them right now. So i say.." im on my way back home, Im hanging out with the guys tonight, and i had a really goood excuse to why i cant meet them tonight"... lol,Maybe she gets the hint, and she just says, "alright well when you feel like being nice, call me"...Needless to say, i didnt call her back...

But i mean, i twas nice ot see Bridgette again.. Sort of, i didnt really see her,she was kind of far away, and my eye sight has been dying over the past few months, so she was pretty blurry, .... Hmm...

I think ive mentioned before that ive always loved the way she called my name.... I remember when we'd call eachother, she'd say "Hi david"... And id make her repeat those two words like 5 times, before i said anything else, lol....

We had alot of smiles. alot of laughs, alot of good times... I honestly didnt see any of it coming.. but I got to see it all go... Fireworks.....I'll probably go ahead and throw that on repeat right now..

Letter to My Unborn Son: Borom's don't settle

Rule #14
You're a Borom. If you ever bring home an ugly girl, im going to tell you... and her...
Dear Son,

Im not encouraging you to be shallow, but just dont settle for less that you deserve. You mother is gorgeous.. I know it... Your dad doesnt look to bad. You dont have to have high standards.. Just high expectations... Hold your women to the same expectations that I hold you to.

Face to face just you and me.. With no rules.. Just like you....I get Lonely too.

Ive played this song 170 times.. on itunes.. Sop you can imagine how many times this was played before i downloaded it, and how many times ive played it from my blackberry.... And its still on repeat as I type this post... ...

"It humbles me"

So earlier this week, i was driving, the sun was setting, and i was doing some thinking. But i wanted company today. So i called up my friend and told her to come downstairs. Luckily she goes with the flow most times and didnt even as where we were going... Until we start driving on lake shore drive,lol. I told her that we were going to the place where my friends and I spent alot of our time....


We went to the lake! The nice, quiet, secluded part of it. 35th. After the skaters leave, its usually, pretty calm over there. So we go, we sit down and start talking and joking around. Then before you know it ,the sun sets, and the skyline is lit... for a moment theres silence.. Just us staring at the scenery. Then i get up and go down closer to the water, but i keep looking.. She ask me whats wrong....I tell her "nothing, this sight just humbles me." Humbles you from what? "Like, if i make a big profit on a trade i did,or if I meet someone that will be crucial resource in my future plans, afterwards I feel like Im on top of the world, the skies the limit... But then I come out here, look out at the skyline, and it shoots me down, off my high horse, I realize that i have work to do, and I haven't hit the pinnacles I plan to reach yet"... then after I was done talking.. She looks at me,smiles and says "you're so weird".. lol

I Hate you and i love you at the very same time!

Fail....

So today, im hanging out with this girl, she is the queen of mixed signals..

I was with her saturday night, and she was wearing these shorts from Abercrombie, which were like super low rise. And her short was rising upo a little bit, and i can see these tattoos. So i ask if their tatoos, just to make sure.. She says yeah, but wont tell me what they are...

Long Story short..


Today,I took her to harolds in Hyde Park, and while we were sitting there eating i was thinking... "what kind of tattoo would this girl have on her vagina?".. So i asked again.. "so are you going to tell me what your tattoo is?"... She was like "no, ill just show you, come here. So i go around the table, she unbottons her pants, and pulls her panties down a bit... And guess what the tattoo is of... Its a heart... With her boyfriends name in it, lol.. All i could do was laugh, and say why?... But in my head, im thinking.... Ive got no chance in hell with this girl.. fail....

I told brett what happened... and he wouldnt stop laughing then he was like.."naw but dave, ive hung around you all before, shes always all over you, maybe shes saying 'i wanna fuck, but thats it, its not going anywhere else'"... Honestly... that means nothing....If anything, she's saying "we're friends, and its all his!"

I got you...

I use to say this all the time. No matter what was going on.. Those three words would always get her smiling... It seemed to "make everything better", maybe provide a sense of comfort.. protection...

But it wasnt just her.. Even when i say it now.. i always get that look. That smile... What is it about those 3 words. Hmm, ill have to find a girl to ask one day... Im really curious.

Do you Feel me.. Tell me am i getting through to you

Ok, i jagged i know..lol

My dude Brett, will not let me forget that o jagged with Bridgette... I think i beat myself up about that enough, lol. But thanks for reminding me. He said "what the hell were you thinking when you told her that you had died? She was legit sad as hell".... And looking back at that day.... I have no idea.. There real is no excuse.. pure stupidity, childishness...Thats one of those days id love to relive. Take that back... Like... i dont even think i like Bridgette anymore, but still... I do not like the wa our relationship ended.. It was just.. bogus.. for both parties...

The Perfect Woman.... To few of these

Man... Memories...

This deserves another post.. after i finish this paper... 4 hours in...My name, and my first sentence..lol