So i decided to sit down and listen to Trey Songz's new album; Passion, Pain and Pleasure... Everytime I listen to trey songz, alot of thoughts start to run through my mind, and many past events always come to the forefront of my brain. I usually either think of one of two people... KiKi or Bridgette.... Im pretty sure that I think of KIKI because that was what we listened to on out first "date". A trey songz mix cd.. And this past year when we would hang out, you would demand that i play "sex room" at least 10 times before you got out the car, lol. Bridgette...I probably think of her because.. for one.. I recorded a video of her sitting on my bed, singing that song to me, lol.. Them also, its alot of things that Trey talks about that i can relate to... And towards the end of the album, the thoughts of Kiki kind of fade...And it leaves just.. Bridgette.. I couldnt even sleep.. I have to write this down. I have to get it out. Its 1:54 in chicago. And I have class in the morning. But im about to be real and honest right now. Im going to discuss the relationship that I had with Bridgette, our rise, our fall...The real story... Previously, parts of our realtionship were kept a secret, omitted from conversations. and wasnt even told to my closest friends.(except probably Brandon, I was with hijm so much, it was hard not to tell him stuff) But today.. right now...Thats all going ot change ....Are you ready? .....
Lets Go...
So i went to elementary school with Bridgette. We never really talked. We said hi and bye... She actually talked to my sister more than me. But she would always stare at me from across the lunch room, or from across the playground, but back then, i paid absolutely no attention to her. She was just.. another insignificant face in the crowd...
I left Ninos, and went to Kenwood, Maybe my Junior year, she transferred there. And while I was standing outside my night school gym class with Kevin, she walks up to me with like 3 of her friends, and said "Your name is David right?".. Yeah, "and you have a sister, dana right"... Yeah.."Do you remember me?".. I looked at kevin and just kind of chuckled, and said "No, who are you"(mean as hell,lol).. Then i guess she was kind of embarrassed, so she said never mind and walked away... But eventually i remembered, and i apoligized to her, I saw her like everyday when i was outside getting in my car, she was walking somewhere with her boyfriend. She would always look, and wave. And I had jade, so id give her the head nod, and keep on moving. She was still a nobody to me. But eventually she got some hair, and she was all of a sudden.. Bad.. Like im not sure if it was my junior or senior year, but I ran up to kevin one day and was like "remember that girl bridgette? She's so bad! Im disappointed in myself for treating her like that"... So She went from being a nobody, to just one of the better looking girls in the school. Congratulations...
So now lets fast forward up until i really start noticing her....
I know for a fact it was senior year. And Menelik and I were always together after school because we had that NFTE program. And while we were hanging around the school, we would see Bridgette like everyday strutting around Callaways office, Menelik would go out his way to give her a hug, and Id just chill back in the cut, and give her the head nod. I remember one day he was like "Man, im putting her on my list, im fucking her before this year is over". I was just like.. Thats a good add, shes bad. But still not really interested...
But then one day...(Maybe the week after the Sara incident)
Menelik and I are walking down the hall on my way to the car in the back, and we walk past Bridgette, Menelik says hey, I say hey, and she give me this same look she always gives me(like a half smile, raised eyebrow type thing)And i just say, "why do you always look at me like that?".. I dont look at you any kind of way. lol. "yeah alright"... So i actually turn around and watch her walk, and she walks into the bathroom, the I turn to menelik and say "Dang".. then I get a couple more steps further, and I hear, "David, I need to talk to you!".. I turn around and see who it is, then I say, "about what".. I just need to talk to you!... Im like alright... Then I get to the car and I start thinking,This was right after Sara was over my house, and theyre best friends, what if shes trying to talk to me about that! I turn to menelik and start thinking out loud.Im panicing.. Because at this time only 4 people know that Sara did what she did.. Me, Sara, danicah, and Menelik...So im like if she told Danicah, she probably told Bridgette too, man if this gets out im dead(mind you this is new david, trying to be faithful and stuff,then sara comes along and messes up my mojo! All night I was like praying that she didnt want to talk about Sara...Maybe my prayers came true...I get to school the next day, I see her alone at her locker after school, and I walk over there and say, So whatd you have to talk to me about? She says "o nothing, I was just wondering if you had a girlfriend". (now this had to be some kind of tactic that she had planned to find a reason to talk to me. I was with Jade for over year, it was not a secret at all. She could have asked any girl in that school, who my girlfriend was, and they would point out Jade. And im sure if she had talked to sara, she could have told her too.)
but I just say "Yeah, im with Jade"... At this time, Im relieved that she didnt mention sara, and we just get into a conversaton. But its about that time for me to go get my mom, and I just say got to go, then leave. But all that night.. I find myself, thinking about her...And it probably didnt help that Jade was in her little mode. So while I have no idea whats wrong with jade, honeslty, i didnt even care becasue for some reason. Bridgette is stuck on my brain.
So jsut so everyone is clear on the time frame.
January 1st I decide that im going to do right by Jade.
2 Weeks later, i slip up, and let Sara into my house. She gives me head. I really wanted to stop her, but.... She was really good...
Although the day after it happened I let her know that i am not going to do that to jade, and I advised that she should forget the whole episode, and act like it didnt happen. She didnt take that to likely. I guess she wasnt use to being rejected.
Two days after that incident,Friday- Jade and I spend the whole evening together just talking and laughing, and coming up with little inside jokes. A great time indeed.
Sunday, Jade starts acting weird, goign into one of her modes. WTF.
Monday- Bridgette "has to talk to me"
Tuesday- I have my first conversation with her.
Wednesday through Friday- We are low key spending alot of time in school together. Alot of subtle Flirting, One time she grabbed my dick, and Kevin saw it, I dont know how I covered for that. Sometime between these 3 days, Bridgette says in the middle of one of our conversatons "I really wish you didnt have a girlfriend".. I honestly didnt know how to respond... so... I didnt. I just watched her walk away, which was always a joy. I would love to watch her leave, but i hated to see her go...
Saturday- Jade and I break up. January 19th ( everything is cool, its like nothing ever changed)
Monday- I finally find a reason to get her number (for some reason, I dont like just asking for peoples number, I like to have a clever reason why I need it)
Monda and Tuesday was the first two days we talked on the phone.. We talked for like 3 hours each night. About, who knows what. Actually I remember one of those days she wanted to match.. And we did, luckily nobody noticed. We wore brown and blue. lol.
Wednesday- the bug is out, people are talking, Jade finds out..Damage control now active for the rest of the week.
Now we;ve been talking for maybe 2 weeks and things seem to be moving really fast. I think I meet her mother that following monday, and i bring her to my church. And its the first day I take her home... I stop in front of her house, and I say "bye" then she says.. "youre not going ot walk me to the porch, you dont have to if you dont want to" ,lol.. I always hated when people say that... But i was really delighted to do so, and I did.. It was cold, and she was all bundled up...Black coat, pink and grey scarf.. we stood just standing, staring at each other..Awkward.. (what now).. I just give her a hug, and go about my marry way... then she yells "call me!", ill smile and say ok. ..The next day is when I take her home again, and this is also the day of our first kiss.(yeah, I know i said before that we had never kissed but, come on guys...) Again,, i walk her to the porch, we're staring at each other again. smiling.. then we hug.. and while shes hugging me, she looks up at me, i look down at her.. and she has that "please kiss me" look on her face, and.... I did. One little peck... right on her lips... she smiles, then touches her lips and says "your lips are really soft".... then we go our seperate ways... the next day is the first day of finals, I take her home again.. and were back on the porch, we kiss again.. this time, i thought we would take it up a notch and throw a little tongue in there...NOT! lol, she stops and smiles, and says not yet, lol. Thats cool, we give our last peck. And go about our way.
That night we talk about it, and she was like.. "I have to do something after school, and I dont want to go all the way home, so can i come over after my finals.. Im like.. Sure why not...Then I think during her lunch, we were standing by the back door (while i was supposed to be taking my law final), and she kisses me again.. Im thinking hey maybe ill go for that next level again... Tried... failed... She stops and says my name in that voice she always used( I loved when she said my name, I remember when we would talk in the morning before school, Id make her say it like 10 times before we said anything else,lol). But after she shut down my attempt, she siad "No david, i dont want to it here, but... maybe later, when I come over".. Im like ok.. After school comes, we hop in the car, and head to my house.. I know her favorite movie is love and basketball so i pop that in. Although, we end up just turning it off, and start talking... So im laying on top of her, and we're just chatting while she's rubbing by head.. Then I hop uo and start playing basketball. And get the idea to do it "love and basketball" style.. "You score I strip, I score, you strip" She was cool with those rules.. So, I play on that rim all day, obviously, I was good....Off comes the jacket.... then those boots... then that shirt.. then those jeans... So I get her half naked before we stop... this Mental image will never be erased from my memory.. She was wearing some red lace boy shorts, with a matching red lace bra... this girls body was amazing WITH clothes on, imagine her WITHOUT clothes on!. So i lay her on the bed, and we get to kissing. Finally got what i wanted, she sort of shoved it down my throat though, a little less than pleasnt.. but we roll over and i start kissing her neck, and as my hands are gripping those boy shorts about to pull the down, I turn around and look at the cable box.. it reads 5:03.. NOOOOO.... We have to stop, now ill do stuff with girls, but i really dont have sex with them. But if you would have seen this girl CLOTHED.. you would understand why i kind of broke down while she was half naked. And i didnt want to let the opportunity pass me by, but.. I had to go get my mom, and take Bridgette to her aunts..So i stop, shes goes from breathing all hard to.. "why are you stopping?", We gotta go, so she wasn't too happy about that, but she went ahead and threw back on her clothes. and before she let, she let me a little present on my neck (f her for that. She was on my neck for like 10 seconds, that mark was there for like a week!)But actually of all the times she came over my house, that was like the only time we were on that. The other times we were just chilin, enjoying each other. Sitting back, watching tv, talking, taking pictures, making movies... Having fun.. No intimate touching though lol.
I dont know what it is though.. Everytime I took her home, adn we stood on that porch and kissed. It felt like the first time every time. Like.. that chill you feel.. I felt it everytime... Its like.. I think that why i still like her.... I wasnt satisfied by the way we ended. I have so many unanswered questions. Im curious.. Did she get me too? I want to know, was she serious when she said all the things she said...I dont think ive ever mentioned it before, but this girl told me that she loved me.. or told my pillow .. but it was still towards me, lol. and like.. she said so many things to me.... And when i looked in her eyes i saw so much sincerity.. And this girl wasnt a good liar... Or maybe she was. But i know i caught her in many lies. But i want to know.. is she totally full of shit or just about 75%?
Like, I spent sooo much time with her.. When she was sick, i was laying under that blanket with her making sure she was alright. When she cried.. i was always standing there with open arms ready to wipe her tears away and assure her that it'll be ok. It eventually got to the point where Destini was like... "Dave, let her fall, let her cry, let her feel something, its like whenever anything goes wrong, 'Super David' swooshes in to save the day"... That was true, and i kind of backed off, but that was sort of when things started going sour anyway.
I remember one day, it was snowing, and Bridgette and I were on our way to my house again, she thought it would be cool to throw a snowball at be, and we get into this one on one snowball fight in the parking lot, until I just go over and grab her, and we basically just stand there by the car face to face looking at eachother.. then Briana and Mellissa come out. and say.. "hmmmm", lol.. we let each other go and i just put bridgette in the car and drive away. But the next day when I saw, briana she said " you and bridgette are so cute together... She always looks so happy when youre around, I bet she was exactly what you look for in a girl, really pretty, light skinned, with long hair. I actually feel bad telling you this because of Jade, but i have to be serious. You and jade only looked nice together because it had just been that way for so long... But you and bridgette just genuinely look perfect for each other, picture perfect".. LOl, briana always ended her statements with something stupid like that "picture perfect".. lol.. But idk.. I kind of agree with her.. I dont think jade and I were really right for each other... We should have just been friends...And me and bridgette.. idk, there was always something wrong with the pictures that jade and I took together, but when B and I took pictures, it was different.. It could have been the worst picture in the world, but there was still always something right about it... Still something that made me smile...
Its 4am...I feel like I have so much to say.. and im honestly not tired because I know it needs to be said.. But im going to go to sleep.. Sleep on all i just wrote... Maybe add another post to finish up... But.. for now.. so long....
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